Friday, March 7, 2008

A Few Thoughts

Well we've got just about a month left and the time is flying. I am excited to go home and see everyone! I am also sad to be leaving. I love my work and I love the people here.

Jason and I have been thinking and praying a lot about the future and sometimes it seems like we're just going in circles. I want to know everything now so that I can get ready for it all. I know that's not how God works, but I've been praying so long that I just want feel some resolution.

Last Sunday night in the English service here we were singing a song called Step by Step. I think most of you have heard it (I will seek You in the morning, and I will learn to walk in Your ways, and step by step You'll lead me, and I will follow You all of my days, etc). When Fernando was introducing the song he had Ruth walk across the stage and he walked behind her stepping exactly where she stepped. He talked about how this song teaches us the way that we should follow God.

When he was talking it kind of hit me that Ruth could've turned right or left and because Fernando was following her he would have turned that way too. It's the same with God I think. Sometimes He shows me where He is going, but sometimes He just asks me to step in His steps. I would like to know if I am going to be turning right so that I can get ready with all of my right turn stuff, but it should be enough for me to know that if I am following God each day He won't leave me. He will stay one step ahead of me, revealing each day. That is what He has promised and that is all I need to know.

So, right now is step-by-step - walking behind God, following the desires He has put into my heart, making plans loosely, fully expecting Him to turn at any minute.

As I have changed my focus from "the future" to right now I have felt a big burden lift off of my shoulders. I was getting so frustrated about not making big decisions that I was not feeling at peace with any of my small decisions. Not any more (at least until God has to teach me again…). Right now I am content with what I know and I am learning to be content with an ever changing picture of my future.